So, lets get one thing clear. Leonard Cohen is a cherished Canadian legend. He's won everything, has been inducted into every hall of fame that matters, has received honorary degrees from universities, and was a Companion for the Order of Canada. He's a big deal. Like a really big deal. Okay, now that we have that established lets get to the music. For this week I listened to "I'm Your Man" his eighth studio album and according to Wikipedia, his most popular by far.
I'll summerize my review in five words: this album sucked so bad. Like not even like a little bad, but really really really really bad.
This is how bad the album was. On my first listen of the entire album I was cleaning the house and not really enjoying the music. Finally a song came on that I enjoyed and I proclaimed to my wife "they had to wait until the end of the album to put the good song there". Nope, I was wrong. Spotify decided that once the album was over it would just continue to play Leonard Cohen music, and the song I liked wasn't even on I'm Your Man.
The songs had no redeeming qualities. The synth-inspired album was filled with terrible songs that I truly could not wrap my head around anything. I promise you I am not usually a curmudgeon - some people may disagree with that statement - but this album had nothing good on it. During this whole project I knew there would be music I did not like, but I would have to try and have an open mind about it. This was not an album I thought I would hate so much. At this point I would bring back Justin Bieber instead of listening to I'm Your Man again.
Its not even like he is singing, merely chanting. I had a conversation on twitter about him because I didn't want to be too harsh. A lot of people did seem to contend he was a wonderful poet and lyricist, and his live performances are far superior than his album content. Many people also contended that his songs are best left covered by other individuals. Other said I had to listen to his earlier stuff to truly appreciate him. I don't care about his earlier stuff, it should have no influence on my opinions of this current album.
Rating: 0 out of 5 Stars. Yes. ZERO.
I can hear it now. "How dare you rank this Canadian treasure as a zero". I'm not ranking him as a zero, I am ranking this album as a zero. His foray into synth music was not good. At all. This album had zero redeeming qualities in my mind. If you can persuade me otherwise I implore you to try, but I am helluva stubborn, and I might die upon this pedestal before I relinquish my opinion that this album is probably the worst thing I have listened to in a long time.
I'm ready for whatever hellfire you folks (all 12 of you that read this blog) want to fire my way. Music is a subjective experience, and my subjectivity proclaims that I dislike "I'm Your Man" more than probably any album I have ever listened to. I will never, ever, ever, recommend this to anyone, or punish myself by listening to it again.
Next week: Anything but Leonard Cohen